Tuesday, January 12, 2010

The Result of Mistakes


I was in my shower tonight after you went off to bed, and I could not stop smiling and thinking to myself "I am so lucky." I've never in all my life been so thrilled to see someone, or grinned so much in one sitting, or trusted in someone with every ounce of my being, or had more fun merely sitting in my trunk talking, or felt more needed. I'm so sorry I messed up, that I risked all of this happiness for something and someone so trivial and temporary. Because, honestly, I cannot even begin to wonder what, at this point, I would do without you. We really have something spectacular, and I just feel incredibly fortunate to have found you. I'm so glad everything with us happened.
I'm so glad we happened.
Because this shit. It's perfectly flawed to the point that it just works seamlessly. She got it right when she said "you two are retardedly perfect for each other."
I love you dear. And I mean it when I ask you if it can be like this forever.
Won't you sit with me at the top of a magnolia tree?

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Epilogue of a Kiss


i want you to know that, after tonight, you're the one who makes my heart pound, my palms sweat, my ears get hot, my eyes squint up, my mouth tighten in a smile, my stomach ache with butterflies, and my soul gleam inside myself. i'm glad i found you. i'm glad i got over my pride. i'm glad i realized age doesn't matter in this instance.
i'm glad you said yes.
because, god, you are so good for me. you make me feel like a kid again, which is especially spectacular because i never was a kid. you let me maintain a sense of childlike wonderment that i never fully experienced, and you stand beside me firmly, supporting every bit of my insanity. your hold makes me feel safe, like nothing in the world could ever go wrong. and that, in and of itself, is the most incredible feeling. perhaps this seems a bit premature, but i have these thoughts. and i'm going to share them.
i know you're no good with women, but i'm pretty sure i'll be as patient as you need me to be in regards to you gaining the confidence you need, and i'll stand along side you every step of the way. i'm sorry this is so intimidating to you, but, as i've told you, know in your heart of hearts that i think you're incredible.
being with you makes it seem like i've finally done something right. thanks.

and yes, let's please go outdoor ice skating.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

First Post?

i don't know if i'm ever going to use this. but. i like to tell people things about myself. i freak out.
i'll describe my freak outs. in detail.